Does your mind conjure up all sorts of negative “what if” scenarios when you think about doing something differently? Are you worried about uncertainty, and as a result you’re not stepping forward in your life?
I know what that feels like. Been there, done that!
Staying small this way doesn't feel good, right?
You want positive, healthy change, but fear comes to visit, and so you shrink back.
I don't want you to be a prisoner of your own mind in that way. So today I encourage you to consider – what you are missing out on in your life because of fear? There is a price we pay when fear wins out. So go ahead and write down now what you are not doing because of fear, and therefore what you are missing out on.
The world is waiting for you – the relationships you want, the experiences to be had, the career growth and business opportunities to engage with, the elevated health and wellbeing, the personal adventure – whatever calls to you. It is waiting.
But chances are your mind has collated a series of “what if” scenarios as mounting evidence about why it's a bit too risky or uncertain to allow yourself to create that “so-called positive change”. Your mind pretends to protect you. It says your fear is real. It convinces you to listen closely to things like…
- Don’t express yourself, what if people will judge you
- Don’t listen to your intuition, what if it's wrong
- Don’t try to achieve that goal again, it didn't work last time, you'll be embarrassed and shamed if you fail again
- Don't do XYZ, there are no guarantees it will work
- Don’t expect too much for yourself, then you won’t get disappointed
- Don’t go for the promotion at work, it will come with responsibility, what if you can't cope
- Don’t try XYZ, there are too many unknowns
The funny thing is that while your mind genuinely wants to protect you and thinks it's doing it's job well (primary job description – AVOID DANGER), in many cases your mind can be completely wrong!
Consider this – a gigantic pile of information has been fed into your mind. Take all the things you've experienced in the past, everything other people have told you (from the moment you were born, through your upbringing and schooling, through to today), everything you've seen in the media and news, and your mind absorbed it all and then tries to navigate this world “on-defense” ready to take care of you and ensure nothing bad happens. That works really well sometimes, when you avoid real danger, but a lot of times it completely squashes you as you stay small to avoid PERCEIVED threat.
The past does not dictate how the future goes. The experiences you've had before don't define what comes next. Other people's experiences, fear, beliefs and words don't project your future. The media and the news broadcasts you see every day don't dictate what will come next for you.
YOU define your coming moment. And you have the choice to let your mind run on auto-pilot (aligning to fearful conditioning that it has picked up over a lifetime) therefore you stay small and miss out on your life OR you can intervene with your conscious awareness and free will, to change your mind, to direct your coming moments in ways that work for you. To not lay down at the feet of fear. To stand up, to rise up, to have things be different for you from this day onward.
So in this vlog, I’m sharing a powerful (and simple!) attitude change that you can start using today to help you take back control over your mind, and break down fear. This attitude change made a tremendous difference for me in the past, and I've used it on the journey to overcome various types of fears – to change how I live, to have more fun, to do adventurous new things, to follow my heart, to see life with new eyes.
I highly encourage you to get practical with this – listen to the above video, write down what you are not doing (where fear has you stuck), what you are missing out on in life, and then apply the tip in the video to break down that fear and show your mind a new way of perceiving and therefore living.
I look forward to hearing your own experiences, insights and feedback. Scroll down to leave a comment below and I will reply back as soon as possible.
Hi B, I read Pinch me a little while ago a was so motivated the world was my oyster. Today’s vlog really resonated with me and I immediately completed the exercise. Completing my goals has been a priority for me if which I haven’t completed until today. I have asked universe for six goals from immediate to later in life. I recall from Pinch me that it was better to focus on one goal – have I set too many? What’s blown me away is I receive your vlog each day and today is the first time I opened one for over 3 months, synchronicity at work. Again I thank you and universe for the kick up the arse :-). Cheers Michelle
Hi Michelle, thanks for your message. While I prefer to say there are no “rules” for goals, it’s about what feels right and good for you, I would say that you have only so much energy and focus to give this world each day, and it’s not that easy to give your attention, visualisation, energy, and action to 6 goals all at once! That’s a lot for any person to create at one time. So it’s not that you “shouldn’t” have lots of goals, just that you understand which of your goals are the top priority, which ones are immediate to create, which are mid-term and which are long-term. You can keep all of them in your awareness and you visualise yourself in the full experience of all your goals achieved, but day to day you might be focusing most intently on the process of achieving one or two at a time, in terms of the actual action you are taking. Hope that makes sense. It also comes down to the nature of your goals as well, because if you were for example wanting to eat healthier and exercise, and you wanted to start a new business, you could likely happily be in action on all 3 of those goals at one time, integrating them into your daily routine, but if instead you were wanting to take on 2 big projects for your career/business and also start a time-consuming new hobby, then doing all those things at one time might not be so effective, because you’d likely dilute your time and effort too much, only making small progress on each but none of them really getting the attention they need to thrive. So again it comes down to the individual person and the specific types of goals as to what is best. B 🙂
this do not work is easy to talk about difficult is doing take action how one can take action when fearfull paralyzed? see i need results a support a place to go when things go wrong the pain of failure the shame what on earth is worth to face those pains?? why try if youy go suffer?
Thanks for reaching out with your questions. We have a free online class for overcoming fear, as well as a free guide to EFT Tapping (which is wonderful for releasing fear and anxiety, negative thoughts, limiting beliefs and things like worry about failure/shame and so forth). Here are links in case those resources interest you as support tools for your journey…