The 6 Rs Formula for Dealing with Difficult People
- REALIZE – realize what you value, what you need, what you will and won't accept (boundaries!), as well as what you can and cannot change.
- RELEASE – release any tendency to try to “control” the other person, expectations you might have of them to be your preferred ideal, and releasing emotions that may be preventing you from being calm and effective in your interactions and communication.
- RELAY – relay to the difficult person or people the relevant information, issues, needs, boundaries and solutions to help them understand and to get you on the “same page”.
- REMEDY – remedy where possible with “healing efforts” to create the change, bond, and better relationship you prefer.
- REDUCE – reducing exposure if necessary such as less frequent contact, shorter duration contact, different types of contact, all to respect your boundaries.
- REMOVE – removing yourself from interaction where necessary, from the room, from the entire location, from the relationship entirely if necessary in order to caretake your physical, mental and emotional wellbeing.
2 Responses
This is a great read. It can be so challenging to deal with difficult people and still remain professional. Having a set of guidelines to follow in your head can make a huge difference in how you handle things. My favorite part is where you say to “remove” yourself. It isn’t always worth the trouble to continue to pursue a situation with a difficult person. -Ryan
Thanks Ryan, glad this resonated and indeed… sometimes removing ourselves is a smarter decision for conserving energy, but also it can at times yield a better result in diffusing the situation. 🙂